If your girlfriend is worried about getting pregnant, play her this song (language warning)

If you ask a girl for anal, and all she says is "Maybe", All you have to say to her is "Up the bum no babies" And don't think its a problem if the river turns to red, Turn the bitch right over, take the dirt track route instead. And some may think that you are weird, But still its worth a try. Coz you can't beat the feeling When you poke her in the brown eye. Forget about your innocense, Coz its already gone. You've a big long list of sins and crimes And soddamy's just one. So if you've got a hankering for some sordid intercourse, Do it like a jedi, fuck her over with the force. And don't you be discouraged if at first it doesn't fit. Remember that that hole's really designed to be an exit. And everybody does it, Though it seems like a taboo. At least that's what my boyfriend told me Last night in the public loos. Religions may forbid it, But I find that absurd. Coz if gods watching you have sex, I guess he's just a perv. So try some role play if she is an anal sex-o-phobe. Its an alien abduction and its time to get your probe. Or if she's scared just say you've got the smallest cock she's seen. Or get her really drunk and 'accidently' slip it in. She may feel violated, Never talk to you again. She may even tell her friends That she reckons that you're in to men. But you can always move away if you feel down on luck. But if you get her up the duff, you're fundamentally fucked. So if you ask a girl for anal, and all she says is "Maybe", all you have to say to her is "Up the bum no babies.".